Monday, November 12, 2007

Update... Even further behind, if you can believe it!

So, I am so behind right now it's laughable. By my count, I have to write 14,000 words tonight to catch up! How much you wanna bet the gap won't be closed tonight? At least these days it's less because I'm afraid to write and can't think of anything and more because life keeps getting in the way.

I'm so far behind, but somehow it still feels better than when I first started, and I'm not worried just yet.

Big week ahead, but lots of opportunity to write. Just gotta give up on the telly, netflix, gtalk, etc. for awhile and I'm set. How hard is that? (sarcasm!) This weekend I am headed to the coast to visit the parental units and meet bro's new lady, so automatic deduction in the amount of words possible without staying up all night staring at the computer screen.

It's getting to the point where I literally have to take computer breaks. I get tired of staring at the screen and sitting all hunched over. I can feel my skin losing it's color! Am I in jeopardy of turning into one of those 24-hour study room freaks from college? Pretty soon I'll devolve into a mole woman, no longer in need of solar energy to survive, having adapted a mimicing process to photosynthesis from flourescent lighting. Eww. I'm grossing myself out. Enough of that.

And enough of this. Time for a break. Court tv, anyone?

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

Wild Goose Chase!

I've been on this wild goose chase all day like a damn buffoon! I'm so pissed I could spit. Bottom line, after driving around like a moron for an hour and a half to find the unemployment office, it turns out to be right around the corner. Literally!

How could someone with a documented excellent sense of direction and a reputation to uphold let something so plebeian as the location of a government office beat her, you ask? It would be hard to do, but google maps gave me completely and totally wrong directions. It basically might as well have sent me through the stargate to a parallel dimension, because there is no way in hell those directions were correct. They took me out of town, goddammit!

So I get to the office, sign in, and prepare to wait and to be patronized. Nope, not me. As a big dunce cap finale, the receptionist informs me that filing for benefits is now done by phone. She gives me a card with a phone number and goes back to typing and answering the phone. Class dismissed!

So basically life is giving me a swift kick in the pants, and I don't know what for. That which does not kill us makes us stronger, right?

Tuesday, November 6, 2007

It's getting worse, not better

I feel sick. This is not working. I just looked at where I'm supposed to be today. At least 10,000 words. I have just over 2,000. And no plot still. I have a headache just thinking about it. Maybe I should start over? Maybe just write small chapters, snapshots of life, a memoir? It would be alot easier than the project that I am working on now. Maybe something like the broke diaries format or something like that. I could just flow, not worried with accuracies, not worried about plot, as it's completely autobiographical.

Am I supposed to be this stressed?!

So I'm at the library, and it's a great place to concentrate. Got the ipod, the WiFi, and not alot of visual stimuli. This is perfect, because as a veteran people watcher I am always getting distracted watching others. That's one positive thing done today -- I discovered this place. But I'm leaving for today. Praying for something better tomorrow!!

Monday, November 5, 2007


Maybe I didn't write a thing today. Maybe I spent the whole time trying to sync my ipod to this new laptop. Maybe apple sucks and microsoft too, because vista doesn't work right with itunes, and they know it and they don't care.

As I type I am finally syncing up, and it's no time to celebrate because I lost every single playcount. I'm not sure if you know what that means, but suffice it to say that alot of my smart playlists are gone, and my ipod is no longer smart about which songs I like to listen to. For someone like me, this is an unutterable tragedy. Some other ish went down with my external hard drive too -- I'm thinking I have dummy copies (or maybe even two) of most of my music somehow, because it's so much I couldn't load it onto this laptop. That means that I am stuck listening to my music on the ipod only, since I can't travel and take my music with me! What a crock!

I'm so steamed.... headed off to bed, hope I won't have nightmares about this itunes mess, and hope I can be productive tomorrow since I basically wasted today.

Boredom Christening

What a time for me to decide to start blogging again, eh?

Let me start out how I mean to finish -- honestly. I'm only writing in this freaking blog because I am dreading going back to this novel manuscript that I started last week. I'm officially competing in NaNoWriMo, but this is really an attempt to break the dam on my creativity.

What it's about: it's about me stopping the meandering madness that I've been infected with, just stopping the erratic movements and standing still and saying enough. I've wanted to be a writer for years now, and I know that I can do it -- that I have the talent and the drive. No more moving where ever, doing whatever. From now on, my moves will be filled with purpose. So it's back to New Orleans!

Two years after Katrina and now I realize that I've only just now made a major breakthrough. And after all the agony of indecision, it's this, it's full circle. Don't tell me God doesn't have a sense of humor.

So let me tell you about my novel (the irony of writing about what I am supposed to be writing about does not escape me).... or maybe I'll save that for the next post. Suddenly I am feeling confident again!